A Coda for Helen Carr

As a preface to this blog post, kindly reference my posts from October 14, 2018 and August 12, 2023 regarding the late jazz vocalist Helen Carr for additional background and contextual information regarding the event described here.

Helen Carr's gravestone is finally in place after 63 years.

As of September 20, 2023 - after 63 years, her gravesite now has a proper marker and recognition. It is not known if Helen Carr had a religious burial at the time of her internment, but it is known that she was raised Christian. Consequently her Committal to God was performed at this memorial service consistent with the Lutheran Book of Worship.
 
Present at this service were Helen Carr’s niece Jean Maddex, and her daughter, Lisa Noel. Also present with me were my wife Patricia, journalist Maryanne Christiano-Mistretta, a good friend Tracey King, and Rev. Arden Strasser, DMin., pastor at Saint Luke’s Lutheran Church located at 308 West 46th Street in Manhattan.

​Dr. Strasser graciously performed the memorial service at my request on behalf of the family.

​The opening remarks reproduced below will hopefully provide some context to the service and explain the purpose of the day.

Opening Remarks from David Nogar
​Rosehill Cemetery, Linden, NJ   September 20, 2023   1:00pm

"Good afternoon.
 
Sixty-three years ago today, Helen Carr went home to be with the Lord. She passed away at Roosevelt Hospital in Manhattan in Ward 3 at 4:20am. She had apparently been admitted to the hospital on July 25th, and she was interred on this spot on September 24th.
 
She was a mother, a wife, a jazz vocalist, and a young woman with hopes and dreams to earn a living doing what she loved. And she did - albeit all too briefly.
 
She and her husband toured all over the country with their musical group, the Donn Trio and Helen;; she recorded two full-length albums for the Bethlehem label that are still in-print to this day, and she sang and recorded with a number of significant jazz artists of the day - some of whom are identified now on this gravestone.
 
She lived off and on in Manhattan for much of her adult life - initially at 101 West 86th Street with her then husband Donn Trenner, and finally at 229 West 49th Street for the last five (5) years of her life.

When she died, it appears it was left to her son Gordon to handle her funeral arrangements, and she ended up here. Her son Gordon was just 18 years old when she died, stationed at Fort Hamilton in Brooklyn with the U.S. Army. Gordon died in 1988, and we have very little information about him.
 
I came out to this site a few years ago in an effort to see if Helen Carr’s date of birth was inscribed on her gravestone, as I could not find any record of her birth date - and it was at that time that we discovered that her grave was not marked. So Ms. Carr’s niece Jean, and I, both knew we needed to mark this grave - and that’s what brings us here today,
 
We don’t know what kind of funeral service Helen Carr was given here 63 years ago. We do know that she was raised as a Christian as a youngster, and we are here to provide her with a Christian service today as we dedicate her grave marker.
 
St. Luke’s Lutheran Church is a Church of which I was once a member back in the 1980s, and it’s located only three blocks from Helen Carr’s last Manhattan residence. It’s a wonderful place of worship that just celebrated its 100th anniversary, and we’re very honored and privileged to have Dr. Arden Strasser join us for today’s service."

Dr. Strasser assists Helen Carr's niece, Jean Maddex with the placement of the flowers.

L to R:  Dr. Arden Strasser,
​Jean Maddex, and Lisa Noel
​(Jean's daughter)

Jean Maddex and David Nogar

​Originally Jean Maddex and I wanted to have the gravestone in place by September 20, 2020 - in time for the 60th anniversary of her aunt's death, but the global pandemic at the time precluded the timing of the original plan.

However, what ultimately needed to be completed one way or another has finally taken place.

No one should have to die virtually alone, and the whereabouts of their earthly remains should not be obscured.

Helen Carr left her mark on this life not only with the people whose lives she touched personally, but with a body of work in jazz music that is still in-print and to which many still listen and enjoy today.

Now we have left our mark for her.

​Rest in peace, Ms. Carr. See you in the morning.

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